10 things you should know about marriage

This paper begins with the info I get from twitterIslamicThinking, and I felt this was a very nice to be known by many people. Large or small, will open our eyes to what is the meaning of the marriage [in the eyes of Islam]. I tried to put it through my own words.

Here are 10 things you should know about marriage:

# 01 Finding a partner is only the very beginning, sustaining the marriage is what defines it.

Finding a partner is only the beginning of it all, how to maintain a marriage that's what counts.

The issue is not merely looking for a partner who will talk about your potential partner, how ideal partner, with a variety of prerequisites that you plan to do with such. Just looking for something to do to this sometimes makes us forget to seek knowledge how to maintain the marriage. Like a campfire at the camp form, we too spend a lot of time to make a fire, but forgot to set up more wood, forgot to prepare fuel, or even set up a tent to forget where we rest.

# 02 Too Often we forget that marriage is a union between two personalities, not a Correctional institution.

Too often we forget that marriage is a union between two characters, not a form of prison (which is the curb and forced adjustments character)

You feel after a long familiar with his vices he had started out? and the character he has started clearly illustrated than any behavior he? You want to try to change him (for the sake of you, because you are not "sreg" with her ​​character). Think again, the marriage was not a prison of one's character. Okay, maybe when couples have the attitude that it is really bad, we can straighten, but for the properties that are actually not too problematic, why should we change it? Marriage is the union of two characters, and that's why the couple should be is different, because the goal is to be able to charge the pair with each other!

Us without our spouse is half, and when there is a partner, then perfected this ourselves.

# 03 We marry to create a comfortable space for individual and collective growth both emotionally and spirituall.

We are married to create a comfortable place as an individual, or as a collective, which grow both emotionally and spiritually.

Sometimes we often fight the will, arguing would desire, or will keukeuh own personal views, and we often forget, that in marriage we are talking about is not "I" and "you", but the marriage was talking about "us". FIRST interests of both, talk well, so that the individual interests of the oppressed was not there. Controlling emotions is very important here, and to control emotions, multiply your spiritual spray.

# 04 Falling in love is easy, sustaining that requires effort and for it to be coupled with mercy.

Falling in love is easy, but to maintain it, we need a tremendous effort and full of affection.

Let's talk analogy again, falling in love is like a shock wave that occurs in a short period, or you could say like lightning. However, lightning is not that we need to moisten the dry earth, fall in love only a small part of that process. Sayanglah love that we really need in a relationship. Form of feelings and actions as small as rain, but continuously wet, until finally the rock was perforated by it. One analogy again, wind is a picture of the business we have to do. Without the wind that brings the rain clouds to the earth, it can not happen.

# 05 Marriage is a partnership, not a competition between two people: it should establish an equilibrium.

Marriage is a partnership, not a form of competition of two people, marriage is supposed to form a balance.

When there is a form of competition in your relationship, something is wrong. Marriage is a ship, and you berdualah the helm of the ship, when you are not able to work together well, the ship will be shaky, not sailing in the right direction or even hit a submerged reef. This is where the role of men and women have to be really balanced, equilibrium point, is when the line of advantages and disadvantages of a man and woman meet at a single point. The point at which men and women it can maximize the advantages of each partner to take up the slack. This is the balance point.

# 06 Men and Women are different: understand this for effective communication and know the differences to cohabit

Men and women are different, we need to understand this so that communication between couples can be more effective and to be able to stay together.

You may have heard if the man and the woman mars venus, or that guy with the stupid human logic and women are human beings with feelings whiny. Whatever it is, men and women are indeed different, that's what you really need to know! Do not like to force the man to see the woman's way of thinking or force women to look at the way men think. Two of these species has a different nature, as they are this couple, like top-down, darkness, and day and night.

Enough with you to know and understand how the natural thought of the opposite sex, it's better. Remember, though different, to the difference when the two met, will produce something extraordinary. If you are sweltering afternoon, and he was a cold night, not a combination of your meeting will result in a bright cool dawn and dusk beautiful shade?

# 07 God Likens spouses to a garment Thus Spake know and understand it consists of imperfections.

God likens as clothing for your spouse, which beautify you, from your imperfections.

Not as pakaia which can be replaced arbitrarily, but as a function of the nature of the clothes, which embellish and cover. That is the role of your partner! The couple is best when you are with him, you feel more "complete and perfect". With him, you do not hesitate to reveal the deficiencies, and he is able to receive and keep your lack of a world that is full of curiosity.

# 08 You may know what you are looking for in a partner, but are you aware of what YOU have to offer?

You may know what you are looking for in a partner, but, if you are concerned with what would YOU give?

This is most often forgotten by us, too busy thinking about the ideal partner types, too busy demanding desires of the couple in the meantime, we forgot to fill the ammunition itself. Until finally we do not know what we will give to the couple. Not! Not supposed to be like that! What we must do instead prepare anything we should have, fill the ammo long before we stepped into the arena of "war" in married life, and ensure that the pair will get no gratitude simply because he has chosen us. Remember, we deserve couples, very inappropriate to get more!

Just imagine, when all pairs were thinking like that, there must be someone who does not complain and beg for love ...

# 09 Do you suffer from face-addiction? Or do you seek beauty in the imperfections of a person?

Are you limited to just fall in love with beauty? Or beauty in imperfection seseorangkah you're looking for?

What is the foundation you choose one? Physical pretty / handsome? Surely, as any normal human I would definitely say so. However, love does not merely speak to physical attraction, there is a greater interest than the physical. When you fall in love for one's heart, another shortage of people that will surely you can feel open and wise, that is the best condition for marriage. Ever see couples who are already grandparents to elderly but still together? Not physical beauty may just be able to make them stick together, no hearts beauty they give to one another.

# 10 It's from the inadequacy of a person to be concerned only with personal gratification and satisfaction.

Above problems arise due to imperfections / insufficiency someone who just thought the mere consideration of personal satisfaction.

Self-satisfaction, without thinking of the couple, it is the root of the problem that must be thrown away. Remove personal selfishness, and try to see the problem from the point of view outside of itself. And more importantly, try to understand the nature of why each person is created with this character and it was, and the reason why men and women should be united in marriage.

Thus my writing, when there is a shortage I apologize, if there are corrections, feedback or suggestions, do not hesitate to be delivered. The author just trying to share a little information and the author's mind about marriage.

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